Wednesday, December 14, 2011

Writer On the Side


Mom in the middle. That's me. Writer on the side, but Mom in the middle, where it really counts.
Don't get me wrong. I love writing. LOVE it! In fact, I recently sold two books to my publisher, Walker Books, and I am so excited for the world to read them!
But for me, being a mom is my number one priority. Because when I write a book, I have all the tries I need to get it "just right." But with kids? If I mess up, I can't go back and fix something by tweaking a scene, or changing the ending. With kids, every single day matters.
I had this epiphany a while back. Childhood is fleeting! It goes by so quickly. Time seems to be speeding up on me and before I know it my kids will be grown and I'll be all alone wondering where time went.
Therefore, my kids come before my writing. Always. I don't think I could instill morals and values into my writing if I didn't first live them in my daily life. So in essence, the fact that I have children, these tiny beings whom I love with all my heart and soul, is what gives me the overwhelming emotional power to write stories that touch other people.
So here are a few things that I have learned along the way:
--Always put your kids first because if they are happy and content, so are you. And if you are happy and content, then you can write beautiful stories.
--Put pieces of what you learn from your kids into your writing--they teach unconditional love, after all, and isn't that what makes life worth living? And books worth reading?
--Revel in the fact that you are lucky enough to be blessed with kids, because the people who dearly want children but can't have them wish more than ANYTHING (even more than you wish you were published, or you wish you were on the NY Times bestseller list) that they were in your shoes.
--Be content with what you have. Want what you already own/have accomplished, and you'll find joy in life. Don't look at other people's grass and marvel at how green it looks from where you are. I guarantee you that they will have grubs at one time or another!
I guarantee you that when you're on your deathbed you won't think, Man, I wish I wrote one more book. But you might think, Man, I wish I spent more time with my kids.
So, what have you learned from life?

6 comments:

Laura Pauling said...

I agree. Childhood is fleeting. I want to enjoy every moment with my kids!

DL Hammons said...

Its a crying shame more people (writers or not) don't share the same priorities! Good for you!! :)

Anonymous said...

Hear, hear! You're brilliant, Bethany. This is exactly how I feel. Though I can always improve. You're such a good person.

Jemi Fraser said...

Totally agree! Life is far too short and precarious to choose another path. Kids first!

Anonymous said...

Dear Bethany. How often do we hear that the simple things in life are free. So often the things which don't have bells and whistles attached are devalued and not given the priority they deserve. We also hear frequently that our children are our future and yet there is a price attached to this - our time; love and commitment. It would be better to have never written a word than to have missed an opportunity to nurture and encourage our children. Many thanks for the wonderful reminder. Best wishes. Jeff.

Roland D. Yeomans said...

Accidental Writer is right. Yhe simple, best things in life are not free. We must water them and the loved ones in our lives with attention and committment.

What have I learned from life? That I need to learn more.

I wish you the best on your novel, Roland